rumple4skin
Apr 26, 2006, 1:32 PM
My apologies in advance for the long post. It is a long convoluted tale that I will try to be concise with.
I am not closeted about my bisexuality but I do not feel the need to tell everyone. I should have the right to tell who I want to tell.
I did tell a woman that I was intimate with. We had a friends with benefits situation. I am friends with everyone in her family too ( but no "benefits" with anyone else :) ). Her 3 brothers and I ride together on occasion. One of them is my best friend. In an attempt to try to make things less confusing without using names I will refer to them as brother1, Brother2 and Brother3. Brother3 is my best friend and he knows I am bi and I spoke to him about being intimate with his sister before anything happened because I value his friendship and wanted to make sure it would not cause any tension between us. He had no problems with it.
I did not tell her I was bi before we were intimate. I did not think it was any of her business since she knew we were not in a monogamous situation. I have since realized that If I do not trust someone enough to tell them that I should not be laying down with them. That is just my point of view and since I know I am bi I will tell people that I will have a physical relationship with.
When I did tell her that I was bi she was very worried that I had given her some disease. She just assumed that since I am bi I am sleeping around as much as I can. I was disappointed in her reaction but accepted it and did not blame her. We talked and no hard feelings so I thought. I asked her not to mention this to anyone because I did not want a bunch of bs over it. She said she would not. Well she decided to tell brother1. I heard through the grapevine that she was saying things about me. I figured word got around and now everyone knows. I was prepared to deal with the fallout and politely tell anyone who had a problem with it that if it changed how they saw me as a friend then they were not really a friend.
Brother2 called me the other day and was very upset with some of his family members. He told me that his sister was saying things about me and he did not like all of the gossiping his family does. I told him I had an idea what she was saying and that I am bi. I told him that I do not advertise it but I do not lie about it either. She asked and I told her the truth. I was kind of expecting him to bug out about it but he said he did not care. He said when brother1 told him the sister was saying I have sex with men he told brother1 that he did not know if it was true or not and did not care and that their sister was a jerk for talking about me behind my back. He told me that it does not matter to him and that I have always been a good friend to him and anyone who has a problem with it should fuck off. I told him that I was glad to hear him say that. I told him that it was not a secret for me I just choose not to tell someone if I think they may get hung up on it. He also said that Brother1 did not care either and thought she was a jerk for talking about me too.
I am glad that it has not caused any problems (yet ) with her brothers. I expect they may have questions or act a little weird but I will deal with that as it comes. In the past I would have let it bother me that she was telling people. I would have been concerned about how others reacted to “the news”. The more comfortable I am with myself the less it matters how others react. I am sure I would have told the brothers who did not know if it came up or there was a point to telling them. I had figured the sister had a big mouth and knew it was a risk when I told her but I felt honesty was the best policy. Now I know she has a big mouth and will not disclose anything I do not want public to her.
I see it as a happy ending. We will see what happens. :rolleyes: You can never really be sure how someone will react.
Well that is my tale. I have learned a few things over this and figured it may be a good thing to post.
Thanks for reading the long post. Your patience is admirable. :)
Rumple
I am not closeted about my bisexuality but I do not feel the need to tell everyone. I should have the right to tell who I want to tell.
I did tell a woman that I was intimate with. We had a friends with benefits situation. I am friends with everyone in her family too ( but no "benefits" with anyone else :) ). Her 3 brothers and I ride together on occasion. One of them is my best friend. In an attempt to try to make things less confusing without using names I will refer to them as brother1, Brother2 and Brother3. Brother3 is my best friend and he knows I am bi and I spoke to him about being intimate with his sister before anything happened because I value his friendship and wanted to make sure it would not cause any tension between us. He had no problems with it.
I did not tell her I was bi before we were intimate. I did not think it was any of her business since she knew we were not in a monogamous situation. I have since realized that If I do not trust someone enough to tell them that I should not be laying down with them. That is just my point of view and since I know I am bi I will tell people that I will have a physical relationship with.
When I did tell her that I was bi she was very worried that I had given her some disease. She just assumed that since I am bi I am sleeping around as much as I can. I was disappointed in her reaction but accepted it and did not blame her. We talked and no hard feelings so I thought. I asked her not to mention this to anyone because I did not want a bunch of bs over it. She said she would not. Well she decided to tell brother1. I heard through the grapevine that she was saying things about me. I figured word got around and now everyone knows. I was prepared to deal with the fallout and politely tell anyone who had a problem with it that if it changed how they saw me as a friend then they were not really a friend.
Brother2 called me the other day and was very upset with some of his family members. He told me that his sister was saying things about me and he did not like all of the gossiping his family does. I told him I had an idea what she was saying and that I am bi. I told him that I do not advertise it but I do not lie about it either. She asked and I told her the truth. I was kind of expecting him to bug out about it but he said he did not care. He said when brother1 told him the sister was saying I have sex with men he told brother1 that he did not know if it was true or not and did not care and that their sister was a jerk for talking about me behind my back. He told me that it does not matter to him and that I have always been a good friend to him and anyone who has a problem with it should fuck off. I told him that I was glad to hear him say that. I told him that it was not a secret for me I just choose not to tell someone if I think they may get hung up on it. He also said that Brother1 did not care either and thought she was a jerk for talking about me too.
I am glad that it has not caused any problems (yet ) with her brothers. I expect they may have questions or act a little weird but I will deal with that as it comes. In the past I would have let it bother me that she was telling people. I would have been concerned about how others reacted to “the news”. The more comfortable I am with myself the less it matters how others react. I am sure I would have told the brothers who did not know if it came up or there was a point to telling them. I had figured the sister had a big mouth and knew it was a risk when I told her but I felt honesty was the best policy. Now I know she has a big mouth and will not disclose anything I do not want public to her.
I see it as a happy ending. We will see what happens. :rolleyes: You can never really be sure how someone will react.
Well that is my tale. I have learned a few things over this and figured it may be a good thing to post.
Thanks for reading the long post. Your patience is admirable. :)
Rumple