My story

[Avocado]

http://www.xanga.com/Test20040804

[julie]

...hey avocado,

...thank you for sharing your story, i was very moved by all that you said.

...it seems that you are going through a real process of learning about, and accepting who, you are just now. So I'm not surprised that you do not feel ready to be out to more people than you are already. I'm guessing, especially with you living with aspergers, that it feels safer to make sense of all these issues in your own head before entrusting them to others who may well offer more confusing opinions for you to process :(

.. it seems, in keeping quiet for the time being, you are trusting your gut instinct?.. I think you will know when you are ready to say more Avocado.

..good luck to you and your fiancee :)

..Julie x :female:

[Avocado]

Thanks very much for that. I typed it just after we moved in, hardly had any stuff set up so little to do. Between typing it and getting the net I began to feel a bit disillusioned about difficulty finding work so I ended up caring less than I did before, I mean what does sexuality mean when you're out on the streets. Did you know that only 12% of people with aspergers and only 6% of autistics have full time work? People say look at most of the people they come across but those that have it less severe won't be noticed as being autistic. I refuse to believe that less than 12% are capable, on a personal note I've never been sacked aswell and I have worked for long periods. But then by the time we got the net I kind of felt better again so the whole thing's gone full circle, it looks like I've been given a job to start next week although I know nothing about it yet.

Anyway, back on topic. It's really hard to know how the 2 things that make me "different" relate to each other. As when I was single I thought I could go through life keeping it quiet, and now I'm kind of protected by being in a relationship - protected from needing to pull, needing to go out, etc - it feels almost as if it matters less than it would if I was single again. How would one effect the other if the unthinkable happened and we split up? Who knows.

One thing I've found since sorting things out in my head and with my fiancee is how little you're asked about your sexuality. I've not been asked once since before we moved!

[canuckotter]

Also, why come out when we have no intention of splitting up? Well, because it’s part of who and what I am, and you should be proud of who and what you are!
Couldn't agree more! :)

And yes, it is surprising how few people will ask about your sexual orientation. In fact, the only person who's asked me directly (outside of the context of conversations where I've mentioned thinking that a certain guy is hot) was my mom, and even she wasn't being serious. But I was in a weird mood that day so I told her the truth. She was a little startled. ;)

Very well written. And congrats on the job. :)

[Avocado]

Couldn't agree more! :)

And yes, it is surprising how few people will ask about your sexual orientation. In fact, the only person who's asked me directly (outside of the context of conversations where I've mentioned thinking that a certain guy is hot) was my mom, and even she wasn't being serious. But I was in a weird mood that day so I told her the truth. She was a little startled. ;)

Very well written. And congrats on the job. :)

Cheers, I just hope it goes well. I was meant to get an email yesterday about the details but didn't, I'm gonna have to ring shortly to ask about the details directly. I hope the job don't turn out to be no good.