What to do?

[JackTexas94]

Recently I have been getting emails from a friend I had a few homosexual experiences with many years ago when we were teenagers. We have rekindled our old friendship via these emails after not seeing each other in years...when I say "rekindle" I mean without the sex part. My friend has made no mention or even any kind of vague reference to this part of our past sexual history despite many subtle hints to it on my part. So...what's really going on? My dilemma: do I dare risk bringing the subject up? Or should I not as he should have gotten my hints and dropped a few hints back, you know, to play "the game." Maybe he does not want to do that and feels odd about it now but then if so why the sudden connection on his part? He lives in another city that is just a few hours easy drive away so it would be cool to hook back up with him but as I said in the title of this post what to do?

[BiBedBud]

Since you're asking: Do it. Take pics. Post them here!

Have FUN and BE SAFE!

:2cents:

[larrywilldo]

Play an online game called "one thing I remember" and get him to share what he remembered about those incidents. He is over playing trucks with you. He has his memories.... see if they match up with your desires. If the conversation doesn't go that way and you keep trying to go there, then it ain't gonna go there. Tell him a story about being in a threesome in college with two guys and a woman and how you licked her as he fucked her. If the conversation does not go sexual, then he is not into it.

The urge to go meet him and drop to your knees in front of him as he sits on the couch is a real desire. Just make sure via email that he has similar thoughts.

[JackTexas94]

Play an online game called "one thing I remember" and get him to share what he remembered about those incidents. He is over playing trucks with you. He has his memories.... see if they match up with your desires. If the conversation doesn't go that way and you keep trying to go there, then it ain't gonna go there. Tell him a story about being in a threesome in college with two guys and a woman and how you licked her as he fucked her. If the conversation does not go sexual, then he is not into it.

The urge to go meet him and drop to your knees in front of him as he sits on the couch is a real desire. Just make sure via email that he has similar thoughts.

I think you're spot on with this. I have played that game and it has gone no where. I guess the truth is he has gotten past that. But still...if he had weird feelings about it why would he start to write? Maybe all wishful thinking on my part. Thank you for your imput.

[Annika L]

Hey Jack,

I agree with Larry's advice, and your assessment of it.

There are lots of reasons he would write to get in touch, including just wanting to see an old friend (I recently remembered a favorite 1st and 2nd grade teacher, and Googled her to see if it was possible to get in touch and say hi). So that part does sound like wishful thinking.

On the other hand, there's nothing wrong with just getting in touch...just meeting for a drink. It is entirely possible that he remembers more than he's letting on...but wants to get some sense of who he's dealing with before he would even contemplate acknowledging that anything sexual happened between you. I mean, if you got to know one another again, and you turned out to be a total whack-job, he's better off if you don't have sexual expectations...and if you can't easily leverage that past with him. Now maybe I'm assuming he thinks more like a woman than is realistic...but this would be a real concern for me, at least.

You've dropped your hints. If he is inclined to remember at some point and to want to reestablish that kind of relationship, he can do that. Just keep your correspondence going, and if an opportunity to see each other in person comes up, do that...but do it without any kind of sexual hopes or expectations. If it happens, you can be pleasantly surprised.

[sysper]

i also agree, don't expect ne sexual activity from ur old friend. it's cool an old friend wants to contact u after so many years. it's entirely possible for an old friend to want to make contact without wanting ne sex out of it. be happy u get to see an old friend. it might be hard if u really enjoyed fooling around. it becomes real hard if there were more feelings than friendship involved. from what u say u have dropped hints & he isn't picking up on them. try & value him & seeing him however hard it might be. friends are so important in life.

[pole_smoker]

Since you're asking: Do it. Take pics. Post them here!

Have FUN and BE SAFE!

:2cents:
LOL looks like our resident troll bibedbud is desperate for amateur porn.

JackTexas94-Just keep it platonic, and don't expect sex, ask for it, play bullshit games, or hint around about it. People who play BS games are a turn off to many people. When I was in a relationship with a woman and younger I had closeted male friends do this to me and it's pathetic that they didn't just come out and say, "You're a hot man I'd like to have sex with you." but I said no since I was in a relationship with someone already, I'm not into cheating, and I don't have sex with friends.

[Neonaught]

I think what you do should depend on how things were left when you parted. Did you both enjoy the experiences you had? Was either party ever feeling remorse after an encounter? If the answer is "no" then why not make reference to the experiences you shared since this is obviously on your mind.

[Hypersexual11]

I guess 'subtle hints' is the grey area. There is no doubt that he remember the sex with you. If he wants to just be friends with no sex, I think he would want to address that issue. He would pick up on the hints and let you know he's no longer interested in that. I think maybe your hints may be too subtle. You guys had sex in the past. My advise is to just put it out there with no games. Let him know you never out grew your bisexual desires but would never push that on him. I have no knowledge of how you were raised. If he is homophobic he may be paranoid that you would use your previous sex against him. He may not be able to initiate what he really wants. I think if he knows he can be your friend, either way, it may make him more comfortable. Who knows. Good luck.

[bikurinpa]

If u dropped hints and he brushes them away with no response, I assume he wants the friendship and avoiding the hints. I had a distant cosin who we played together yrs ago,I dropped hints of doing I again, but he eludes the hints or changes the conversation subject so I get the hint and see he is not into it no more.
Remember he saying, "take the hint before the kick" or "Read between the lines"!

[donttellnehismy]

I think you should say remember when (fill in the blank) If he reacts negatively back right off or just laugh it off... However if he's into it... well

[JackTexas94]

Excellent advice all and I DO appreciate it! The thing to do I see is just be a friend and let the past be the past and move on.