Just Wondering

[gentlepen9]

I know this may be a bit odd to ask but being that
I haven't had the opportunity to experience a same
sex encounter, I was wondering is sex with a woman
any different than being with a man? I know there's
the obvious physical difference but other than that
is there any real difference between the way women
make love compared to men?
Just curious.

[TorontoGuy2007]

i'm certainly not an expert, but i suspect that there would be no way to generalize sex from all men or all women.. each individual is unique.. sex isn't just about the other person. it's communicating your wants and needs too.. sex can basically be invented every time you do it.. make it what you want it to be..

[Long Duck Dong]

in a nutshell.... yes

if you were to strip away all the sexuality, thoughts, feelings and emotions etc... the answer is still yes

asking a person to explain it in very simple terms is next to impossible

[someotherguy]

Since you are a woman, let's ask you! This was a trick question, right?

[littlered64]

The answer is YES!

Women know of other womens desires and know how to treat and please eachother. Nothing against men, I have been married for 21 years to a wonderful man. I prefere to be with women. Just the closeness and holding and understanding one another makes sex more different. That's my opinion and I know many of my bifriends have said the same.

LittleRed

[gentlepen9]

No, it's not a trick question. I know that when you get down to it each individual is unique but just in a general since was there a difference? I personally tend to be of the mind that you can't lump people into sexual styles simply due to there sex but when talking to straight men they tend to say they have to take their time and be romantic or that women like it slow etc. And when talking to straight women they tend to say that men are more direct and to the point. Now as individuals who have been with both, I was wondering do such generalizations still apply? Or have you experienced that there's a great variety between the sexes?

[LoveLion]

Women know of other womens desires and know how to treat and please eachother. Nothing against men, I have been married for 21 years to a wonderful man. I prefere to be with women. Just the closeness and holding and understanding one another makes sex more different. That's my opinion and I know many of my bifriends have said the same.


That probably goes for m/m too I would think. Its not an insult to men or women, but guys and girls take alot of time exploring their own bodys and know exactly what the things they are doing to their partner feel like. Iv never been with a woman, and honestly, I wouldnt know what the hell to do with a vagina. But I know exactly what to do with a penis.

[innaminka]

in a nutshell.... yes

if you were to strip away all the sexuality, thoughts, feelings and emotions etc... the answer is still yes



Beautifully put.

The main, major diferences? 3 "T's" Tenderness, touch, and TIME

[TorontoGuy2007]

interesting comments so far.. most seem to point to the females wanting more romance, foreplay, cuddling, touching, taking your time, etc, and understanding the need for this stuff better than men do, which as a general comment is fair enough..

but i'd argue that some guys want and even need these things too.. guess i'm just in the minority when it comes to that..

well, my first few sexual experiences with women were totally opposite to this thinking.. i was the one that wanted the cuddling and foreplay, etc.. and they were the ones that just wanted to get it on.. and that totally turned me off to the point where i couldn't even do it! ...very strange. guess it's just the luck of the draw..

i certainly hope my first experience with a man will include all of these feminine characteristics.. i can't see love making without them... no matter who it's with!

[AngelOfTheMystic]

I too am bi and have been with women as well as men and to me yes, there is a difference. The touch and feel of a woman is a lot softer and sensual than it can be with a man. It's kind of hard to explain unless you have been there which I STRONGLY recommend that you do!

[twodelta]

......Iv never been with a woman, and honestly, I wouldnt know what the hell to do with a vagina. But I know exactly what to do with a penis.

Well said LoveLion :eek: Well, I have been with both and yes their is a difference. And I think that difference IS familiarity. Not to be bragging, but I've recieved numerous compliments from guys after oral sex, and they ask why I'm so good. I always tell them that I just do what would feel good to me. Who would know better how to please another guy than a guy or woman than a woman. And Torontoguy, You're not alone. I, as well as many guys that I know enjoy the softer side of sexuality - Dave

[someotherguy]

From only my own experience, I see no difference by sex, only by individual. There are some very sensual people, who connect and tune in, and there are those who knock about blindly. That same-sex lovers can relate their own sensations more directly is balanced by the way opposite-sex lovers suit each other. Each case has a built-in advantage, and each lacks something significant.

[LoveLion]

interesting comments so far.. most seem to point to the females wanting more romance, foreplay, cuddling, touching, taking your time, etc, and understanding the need for this stuff better than men do, which as a general comment is fair enough..

but i'd argue that some guys want and even need these things too.. guess i'm just in the minority when it comes to that..


Not so much of a minority. I am the same way. Im not into the whole sex for sex's sake, or 1 night stands or random encounters for sex of anything like that. When I have with someone I want there to be a connection, I want it to be romantic and I want the other person to care about me as much as I would care about them. Again, I dont have much experience, but from what I do have and what I know about my desires, Foreplay and the cuddling afterwards is my favorite part of sex.

[coyotedude]

Yes, I've found having sex with a guy to be different from having sex with a woman - and not just from the obvious differences in plumbing!

It's not just the differences in how a man pleasures you versus how a woman pleasures you, however - in large measure because individuals have varying talents, skills, and interests in lovemaking. When we're just starting out, perhaps, a guy has a better idea of how to handle another guy than a woman would.... but a woman with experience will likely give much better head than a guy who's going down on another guy for the first time!

For me, the differences are more intangible. Sex with a man feels as natural to me as sex with a woman. But sex with a man meets different needs - strikes different chords, if you will. Not just on a physical level, but also mentally, emotionally, spiritually....

It's very difficult to describe, quite honestly.

Peace

[Lorcan]

I have sex with a handful of men and i'll tell you, men are all different. Some put in and thrust, and that's it. Some do foreplay. Some like it fast. Some like it slow. Some like to cuddle; some don't. Since there are so many types of men, how can I compare to woman?

I only went all the way with one woman, and after i did i thought to myself, "it's the same thing". So TO ME there wasn't a difference. But that's just me. I'm sure the majority of bisexuals feel there is a difference.

Woman are softer to the touch. Their lips, their body, their nipples.... it's all softer. That's the thing i noticed. But then my husband has pretty soft lips too. :tong:

[ambi53mm]

Great question GentlePen and this may one of a handful of sites where this question can be asked without seeming a bit odd and the answers genuine in reply. I’ve had far more female sexual partners than male, but enough of both to draw some generalizations based on my own experiences.

Sex with another individual is a shared experience and an exchange of energy that can be broken down into the physical, emotional, mental, and from my perspective, the spiritual.
Ultimate sex is the inclusion of all of these and I don’t think a person’s gender makes a noticeable difference one way or another I’ve never experienced this in a same sex situation and in fact I’ve only experienced this with one individual ever and it happens to be the individual quietly sleeping besides me. I believe for me it’s the ultimate sexual expression but have no doubt that it’s possible with no regard to gender because it reaches a level or depth where gender becomes irrelevant.

Great sex needs at least two or three of those components. Based only on my own experiences and observations, with females the important two appear to be the emotional and physical and with males the metal and physical. This I think will differ based on that which passionately moves you in the moment and is independent of the exchange meaning in same sex situations it could be one sex experiencing the emotional and physical and the other experiencing the mental and physical and both parties feeling enough of an exchange to label it great sex. Not all women require the emotional connection nor do all men require the mental connection but how the physical part is experienced in regard to enjoyment may be in part to either or both or vice versa.

Sexual excitement and sexual enjoyment are two different things. Sometimes the body will react with excitement or arousal devoid of any enjoyment and sometimes when it seems as though it should react under the most excitable circumstances it totally shuts down. Gender doesn’t appear to be a factor here either. Rape victims report of experiencing arousal, and a male surrounded by willing partners of both sexes can’t seem to get it up. The brain is one amazing sex organ!

This is just a very broad subject worthy of discussion and I’m still leaning myself, but wanted to share a few thoughts on the subject

Your question as to is there a difference I’d have to answer with sometimes there’s a difference but depends on how you define “making love”.

Ambi :)

[GreenEyedLady(GEL)]

I know you have been curious for some time , at least you've been posting threads for awhile and I havn't seen a " I finally did it " thread yet. I'm not sure if your having trouble meeting women or are apprehensive of it in the sense that its a big step to take, but I think everyones experiences will be different. People can give you their persectives on it, but you just need to experience it for yourself. When it comes down to it, I know you'll find your experience will be so different mentally and physically then your love life with your husband. I find through your writing that your a very unique individual, and I think if you over analyze this too much it might not be exactly what you were hoping for. Telling you to just try is easier said than done, because its not that easy to meet people. But I do hope that when you finally meet that special woman that making love to her is everything and more of what you were hoping for :) Good Luck !