BJs and HIV/STDs

[BBMfan08]

I have read the other threads which discuss how wonderful it is to give blow jobs, and I have to agree. However, I'm concerned about acquiring HIV (or other STDs) from engaging in this practice.

Please read the following:
www.managingdesire.org/oralsexriskfactors.html

(If the link doesn't work, copy and paste it into the address line of your browser window.)

Opinions, please.

_________________________________
If you can't fix it, you gotta stand it. :(

[guycurious]

That report is dated July, 1996. A bit old for reliable data IMO.

[Trek7200]

Rule of thumb - Swallow or spit, just don't let it sit.

[jem_is_bi]

I would not have sex at all if I could not swallow my lover's cum.
But, I do not have maximum exposure to disease, because, I have no desire for many, many sex partners.
While lot's of sex with lots of partners is a nice fantasy for me it would be awful as a reality.
Then, you have to just hope that one or a few is not one too many.
You cannot avoid all risk and live a full, happy life.
If all goes badly, you still have more than nothing to be happy about, which is what you get if you do nothing because you do nothing but live in fear.

[proseros]

An STD is an STD. There is no single sexual act (unfortunately) that is utterly immune to risk. If you whore yourself to exposure to STD's then you will get exactly what you expose yourself to. Otherwise if the conditions and the circumstances are right, in any instance, you are throwing dice, in which case sucking a dick is no more or less riskier than crossing the street, all caveats being equal.

[curious44]

We were avid swingers in the mid/late 70s through the early 90s. Once the AIDS thing came to the for-front we stopped having indiscriminate sex with whoever and settled on 3 couples who we formed a group with and swung with only them. None of us ever "came down with anything". I missed the "free love" days, but I'd rather miss that than have our grand kids know their grandfather died from AIDS.

[fairbankswingers]

We also watch who we play with...get to know them, and as far as BI male stuff we really, really, REALLY watch who we play with...we have been swinging since 99 and have only been with a FEW couples (count them on one hand) and only a very select few bi married guys who were part of a swinging couple...we also get tested, and let our friends know our status (HIV -) and do not have anything elese...we also like to knopw our friends a little more then one night before having mind blowing or any kind of sex for that matter...:)

[elian]

Honest question - when you all say "we get tested" - I mean - a full sample panel that covers every possible disease can be a few hundred dollars per..what do you consider "good enough" as far as testing?

[Iowabiguy]

We also watch who we play with...get to know them, and as far as BI male stuff we really, really, REALLY watch who we play with...we have been swinging since 99 and have only been with a FEW couples (count them on one hand) and only a very select few bi married guys who were part of a swinging couple...we also get tested, and let our friends know our status (HIV -) and do not have anything elese...we also like to knopw our friends a little more then one night before having mind blowing or any kind of sex for that matter...:)


I get tested on a regular basis like all good responsible poly/swingers should do. The fact that you distance yourselves from bi-males smacks of biphobia. The same crap that bi-males are the disease carriers of society is rampant in the lesbian community. The level of trust that a person has been tested whether that person is coupled or single should be the driving force. TRUST!!
Get to know ANYONE you want to have sex with and know their sexual history and status but to dismiss or over-scrutinize a bi-male is biphobia and should be called for what it is.

[vittoria]

I get tested on a regular basis like all good responsible poly/swingers should do. The fact that you distance yourselves from bi-males smacks of biphobia. The same crap that bi-males are the disease carriers of society is rampant in the lesbian community. The level of trust that a person has been tested whether that person is coupled or single should be the driving force. TRUST!!
Get to know ANYONE you want to have sex with and know their sexual history and status but to dismiss or over-scrutinize a bi-male is biphobia and should be called for what it is.

Its a shame that so many people treat bi males in this fashion.

Bf gets that kind of crap. I was trying to talk to this one chick, and I told her that I had a boyfriend, and she didnt have a problem with it. I told her he was bi, and she was all "Ewwwww gross" and shit... I promptly, ( in my now known fashion) albeit POLITELY ( wish I couldve smacked her tho) informed her how many people think "Ewwwwww gross" when it comes to bisexual women and how unfair it is to single out one side over the other in such a discriminatory fashion--never spoke to her again.

Yes, its that kind of mentality that needs to be eradicated from society... before WE are treated like WE need to be eradicated.

[elian]

fairbank policy seems OK to me - I mean you gotta be safe - I was just wondering what people consider to be acceptable testing since there are several different tests one could do. HIV obviously is a no-brainer. The number of people I have been with in a sexual way I can count in the low single digits - I'm just trying to be responsible and ask for a consensus on what people think is appropriate.

[Shy Sally]

Best would be people would live only in a fixed relationship, no one´s looking left or right and all grow old together. Maybe thats written in the holy bible. But that´s not real life. In life you meet always people and -thank´s god- a lot of new ones. Then you cannot control, what your partner or the partners of your partner have in their own personal relationship. It´s always a risk. And you should be aware of that, if you are going to have sex.
But I know it´s not that easy as it sounds. I will never forget, what I have done when I was drunk, having sex with some sweet people and without using condoms. I was so stupid!!! When I was sober again, the whole fear of live came over me to find out if I was pregnant or having STD. And I lived in fear for many months, when I was lucky at least not to be pregnant or ill. Especially the conciousness of life and death being so close together is a point which make it do better next time, to take a condom with me and so on.

So I´m glad to be healthy and I want to stay

[fairbankswingers]

I get tested on a regular basis like all good responsible poly/swingers should do. The fact that you distance yourselves from bi-males smacks of biphobia. The same crap that bi-males are the disease carriers of society is rampant in the lesbian community. The level of trust that a person has been tested whether that person is coupled or single should be the driving force. TRUST!!
Get to know ANYONE you want to have sex with and know their sexual history and status but to dismiss or over-scrutinize a bi-male is biphobia and should be called for what it is.
Where did we say we ran or distanced ourselves from anyone...be it a man, a woman, or anyone we are CAREFUL...I mean we dont go jump off a bridge just cause, nor do we drive at 100 miles an hour down a winding road...we take precautions, and we make sure we trust and are comfy before we play, to say we are bad for that is just plan stupid as we never say that about your style of play...we are a BISEXUAL COUPLE...I (the male half love men as much as woman, she likes the attention of both as well)...we dont judge others by thier rules...and to be honest most every single couple we have ever met has had rules...our one rule is testing and get to know a couple before sex...our second is no single men unless we have known them a while and they understand our relationship...same for bi woman, they have to know the wife and I are the wife and I...we prefer couples just becuase we prefer couples...our deal, and our b-ness...you mind yours and who you play with and we mind ours...cool
As stated by one poster We totally agree it sucks that BI-men are looked down upon and bi-woman are accepted in every single swing clib, or board...but we live in this world and have to adjust...we deal with it, and dont let those folks bother us...we just find others to hang with...

[fairbankswingers]

Honest question - when you all say "we get tested" - I mean - a full sample panel that covers every possible disease can be a few hundred dollars per..what do you consider "good enough" as far as testing?

we get regular check ups and we get the full panel each year - reason is becuase we are into swinging and we are both bisexual and dont want anything, nor do we want to transfer it to anyone if we were to have anything...