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[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Again, I didn't pay too much attention to what was going on with the other guys who were like me - and when we weren't doing it to each other like the fiends we were - but I found out quickly that there weren't too many places I could go and not run into a guy who would decide that asking me The Questions would be a good idea. One of the things I realized when I got much older was that during the early times, I [B]never[/B] had to ask either of the questions... because someone was always asking me. It wasn't that I had a problem asking The Questions but it always turned out that someone would ask me before I could ask them.

In a lot of situations, the guy asking the first question was asking to find out if he was really the only one who was thinking about doing it with a boy and if the answer was yes, then it was time to play a "20 Questions" kind of thing - what was it like, does it feel good to have it done to you in the hiney - stuff like that and, oh, yeah - are you shooting The Stuff? Add on the question of whether or not you played with yourself and by the time all of these Questions got asked and answered, young dicks would be very hard and doing something about that became a very exciting necessity. I mean, really: Who didn't want to do it with another boy and more so when everybody knew it wasn't allowed?

It was just way too easy. Two main Questions to be asked and answered. And if a guy was too afraid to do it - and despite being very eager to - it wasn't that big of a deal and, a lot of times, a guy who was too afraid at that moment would eventually stop being all that afraid and among my very horny friends, if there was a guy who didn't want to do it in any way with a boy, well, there had to be something wrong with them! And the only thing any of us were deathly afraid of was getting caught doing it and especially in the time I was growing up because that was the time that any adult in the neighborhood who caught you doing anything you shouldn't be doing could beat your ass, drag you home, tell your parents what they caught you doing and you could now look forward to getting your ass beaten again.

Despite this, it didn't do a whole lot to stop us from pulling our dicks out and putting them to good use.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I've been a student of bisexuality ever since I learned the word and connected it to how I was having sex with both boys and girls and despite the level of adherence to morality in those early days, it was so easy to have sex with someone and especially boys.

You could always tell the guys who were interested because you would eventually be asked The Questions, plural because there were two of them. The first, which indicated curiosity, was always, "Have you ever done it with another boy?" and "it" was, of course, have sex (or doing the nasty as we called it). The second, which could have a dual meaning was, "Do you wanna do it?" This one usually meant the guy asking the question had done it before and wanted to do it right then and there but sometimes it meant that, if the first question was asked and answered with a yes, it was an offer to sneak off somewhere and do it to each other.

While some guys would be a bit hesitant to ask the second question of someone that, say, they just met, there would be a bit less hesitation to ask the first question and I never figured out why it was "easier" to ask the first question than the second but it was what it was but if you knew a guy or met a new one and got to talking long enough - and I'm talking minutes and not days - you could bet anything you cared to that you'd be asked one or both of the questions.

Now it was simply a matter of how you answered either of the questions: Yes or no. Now, sometimes and depending on who was doing the asking, if you said no to the question of ever doing it with another boy, the next question just might be, "Do you ever think about doing it like that?" which, depending on how you answered that one, might lead to the "official" second question and, yeah, sometimes, the guy asking that... middle question would just keep asking stuff along the same lines until you definitely said no or you "caved in" and said yes - and now it's time for the "official" second question to be proposed.

With guys you'd already done it with, there was no need to ask anything other than the second question and while there was always the choice of saying yes or no, yeah and usually, if a guy asked if you wanted to do it, your response would be, "Where?" Not "when" or "what." Making getting some dick even easier was that, most of the time, such conversations didn't take a whole lot of time, even when a guy had to get up the nerve to ask the question and then only in the situation where the two of you were just making each other's acquaintance and each other's coolness was established.

I didn't pay that much attention to how other guys dealt with this and The Questions but for myself? The answer to both was always yes [I]unless[/I] there was something about someone I'd just met that didn't sit well with me but that didn't happen a whole lot... at first, anyway. Otherwise, if a guy wanted to do the nasty with me, I was all for it and it never mattered what he wanted to do because, in the early goings, if you were into doing the nasty with boys, you both did it all: Sucking and fucking.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[QUOTE=Kpoore4;352172]Near Monroe here[/QUOTE]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]We got cleaned up and dressed and as we did those things, Jim was talking a mile a minute; he was telling me that he hadn't been sure that I would agree to let him blow me, didn't expect me to blow him and didn't even expect me to fuck him. I heard him just fine but being in that moment of absolute clarity - and for as long as I was - was fucking with me because I just didn't know or understand why it would happen.

"Are you always like that?" he had asked.

"Like what?" I asked, wondering what he was talking about.

"So intense. So focused. I thought I was good at sucking dick but you've got me beat by a long shot!" he said.

"I do my best - and I'm glad you enjoyed it," was all I could say because if that's the impression I gave him, I knew I couldn't explain how involved but totally detached I was when he started sucking me and how it just kept going and nothing was breaking out of that place. I was still resolving this very annoying thing in my mind and, again, almost missed Jim saying that he hoped we could do this again and soon and that he was glad to have met someone who would fuck him and like he'd always wanted to be fucked.

I wasn't paying a whole lot of attention to myself but heard my voice say, "Well, you can fuck me if you want to next time..." and dimly registered him saying that he'd rather be fucked and maybe something about not being good at fucking or not liking it. I very much hate being in that moment of absolute clarity because it would eventually go away and now that part of myself is behaving like I was never in that moment at all - it was like it never happened and that the only thing that did really happen is I found a guy I liked having sex with as well as learning that he was like me, too.

Jim and I went on to have sex with each other another five or six times... and that moment of absolute clarity never showed its face again except when I'd cum and I was right back to not paying any attention to it because I knew there was nothing I could do about it even if I wanted to. I'd never know or have a clue when it would show up like this; I hated it, hated that detached and clinical feeling but I liked it and I just chalked it all up to me just being weird like that.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Being in that moment of absolute clarity is so bothersome but allowed me to just watch my dick being in his ass... but, again, like it was someone else's dick and it was so deliciously weird but not the way I knew I should be like I shouldn't be thinking about how nice and nasty my dick looked in his ass or having thoughts about how wide my dick was spreading his hole to accommodate me.

I was fully into fucking Jim... and not really thanks to absolute clarity; I knew exactly and precisely what I was doing and I knew good and damned well that I shouldn't be doing this and I shouldn't be liking any of it and I even heard myself... laugh? to think about how fucked up this moment was since I was obviously dick deep in another man's backside and on my way to busting a nut in him and as deep as I could manage.

From my perspective, everything was sharp and clear; the moment of absolute clarity had me firmly in the moment and, to me, I blinked - and all holy hell broke loose inside of me. The clarity that held me in its sway whispered in my mind, "Look at you sowing your seed in his ass and it feels so good and nasty, doesn't it?" and even though I was being swamped by my unexpected release. I blinked again... and now I felt like I didn't seem to know how I wound up in Jim's ass but there was I just the same and this momentary confusion almost made me miss the fact that Jim was kinda laughing and telling me that he didn't expect to get fucked... but he was glad that I fucked him.

I was spent and drained both mentally and physically and I was thinking that if Jim wanted to fuck me, I wasn't going to put up a fuss about it because I was too worn out to fuss about anything. I laid there on top of him until my dick got soft enough that his hole was able to evict me and that other moment of absolute clarity that comes after I cum was fucking with me big time but I felt so good, too. I sat up as much as I could, feeling my head swim dizzily for a moment and asked Jim if he was okay...

He answered with a snore and all I could do was shake my head and grin over the fact that he'd gone to sleep for a moment. He really did just nod off for a brief moment and "woke up" when I moved to get off the sofa and go searching for a bathroom so I could get cleaned up. He saw me moving and guess where I was going because he said, "Good idea..." and caught up with me and guided me upstairs... with his hand on my ass.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]There was no question over whether or not my lust was alive, well, and at work; when I moved, I pretty much manhandled him into position so I could get my mouth on him... and I was once more feeling very detached and that clinical voice said, "You're sucking another man's dick..." and paying "too much" attention to what my body was doing "all by itself."

My lust to suck him was consuming me and as usual but I couldn't shake that odd feeling of watching myself doing it and as if I was watching a movie; I was aware of everything and it was even more exciting being in this peculiar state of mind and using my mouth, lips, and tongue to entice another man to spill his seed... and thinking about every way I knew of to get him to do just that.

I collected a lot of spit on my thumb and just pushed it into his hole until I could feel the base of my thumb come to a stop; I heard and felt him gasp; felt his cock pulse and ripple for just a moment; heard him say, "No, no...," and felt his hands on my head, his fingers absently feeling my face and felt him screwing himself onto my thumb. It just felt so...weird to witness myself having my way with him and being further encouraged being very aware of the exact moment when he had whatever control he may have had wrested from him, giving himself up to what I was doing to him and knowing that at this point, I could do anything I wanted and he was completely helpless and at my mercy.

I could feel my dick getting hard and the clinical part of this moment of absolute clarity suggested that it would be fun to stop sucking him and fuck him, to see the look on his face as my dick got pushed into him and "giggling evilly" to know that he would do - could do - nothing to stop me from fucking him. But that meant that I'd have to stop sucking him and I didn't want to disrupt the moment; I was still detached from it all but with my lust still running strong as Jim fucked into my mouth and worked his ass on my thumb; I even noticed the moment he grabbed one of the pillows that had been on the sofa and covered his face and mouth so he could let out a primal scream as his dick got harder and more swollen... and he spilled for me.

Not that he had a choice in the matter. In that moment of absolute clarity and being so detached, I found his cock pulsing in my mouth to be... interesting and that part of my mind was busy and happily thinking about the mechanisms involved in that delicious pumping action; his sperm was filling my mouth and that part of my mind not only said that his spunk tasted wonderful, it was even going over the makeup of his spunk and how his body was producing so much of it... all while the lusty animal that was driving my actions was losing its shit over how damned good I felt to have sucked his dick and made him cum.

Then that detached part of being so clear said, "You should fuck him because fucking another man is so wrong and nasty..."

I don't think that Jim was even aware that I had moved; I don't think he was even aware that I was flipping him over onto his stomach and arranging him and myself so that, after I applied as much spit as I could to my dick, I could push my dick into him and, oh, yeah - if he hadn't be aware before any of that, he was very much aware now. In that detached clarity, I could hear him saying yes and no; was aware of how his body wasn't resisting me and I watched with great clinical interest as my cock spread his hole open and went inside of him and noted how he was starting to fuck back against me and so much that the rest of my dick just went into him until it couldn't go any further.

And, in that detached state, I heard my voice saying, "You like this, don't you?" I felt him shudder when he said that he did and everything seemed to go... quiet as I fucked my dick in and out of Jim's ass and the only two things I was very much aware of was that I had no business fucking another man... and it felt very damned good to be fucking another man. Besides, he wasn't complaining...[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I was very much into what he was doing; I could hear the way I was breathing, could feel my pulse racing and could hear it in my ears; a sheen of perspiration coated all of my nakedness and I was... content to let my body fuck into his mouth on its own accord. I offered no resistance when Jim slid his hands under my ass and started "shoving" me into his mouth but I felt a spasm of disappointment because, I dunno, I thought or was hoping that when he got his hands under my ass and lifted me, he was going work his dick into my ass... but he didn't and I was also okay that he didn't.

Jim was working very hard to get me to cum and because I was in this moment of absolute clarity, it was... holding things back a bit but not purposely so... which is what I hated about these moments but what I also loved about them because of the stark reality taking place on that sofa: A very masculine kind of guy sucking my cock and doing it well enough that I could easily think of all the women who'd be put to shame due to their comparative lack of enthusiasm.

Jim looked up at me, holding the head of my dick in his mouth and letting his tongue do whatever it felt like, probing and searching for those sweet spots so that he could hit them in just the right way and make me just lose control... but in this moment of absolute clarity - and until it got out of my system - what he was doing didn't have the full effect that both of us wanted. He didn't seem to be... disappointed or impatient but he clearly wanted me to cum and I sure as fuck wanted and needed to.

He took me deep and held me there; he'd finally gotten some saliva on his finger and enough to push his finger into my very unresisting hole and far enough that I felt that... twist in my stomach when he poked my prostate, which got me to start fucking his mouth with a purpose... but I still felt detached. I knew I was talking to him, telling him how good it was feeling; I could feel the little tremors that had been rippling up and down and through my shaft become bigger tremors and I watched myself preparing to cum with that same clinical detachment... well, until our combined efforts pushed me to the point of no return.

My dick swelled in his mouth and so hard and fast it made me gasp for breath... and "the bomb" went off in my head as I started shooting my load into his mouth and disconnected that moment of absolute clarity. His finger in my ass felt like a hot poker and as my dick pulsed, I could feel my ass muscles clamping around his invading finger with each pulse. Jim sucked harder to milk every drop from me and I could hear myself... growling like some kind of wild animal as my dick began to soften and, for a moment, I didn't think that Jim was going to let go of me so I could get my mouth around his dick and I was sure he was licking my very sensitive cock head to "punish" me for making him work so hard to make me cum.

But he released me and said something about how nice my dick was and how good it and my nut tasted... and I barely heard him, not because I was still going through the "afterglow" of my release but because I was... confused when that damned moment of absolute clarity returned but now with a specific focus on sucking Jim's cock.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I was lying on "Jim's" sofa with one foot on the back of it and the other planted on the floor; Jim was settled in between my splayed legs and sucking my dick for all he was worth, holding on to it with one hand while the other alternated between playing with my balls and rubbing my hole with a finger - and making me wish he'd stop messing with it like that and just stick his probing finger in there.

We'd gotten to this moment because between the two of us, we just couldn't figure out what else we could do after I'd come over to help him with a home project he was working on, which got finished rather quickly. We had a couple of beers, called ourselves watching TV for a few before he just blurted out, "I wanna suck your dick; you good with that?"

Shit... why not? I wasn't particularly horny and getting my dick sucked was the last thing on my mind but since he offered, again, why not? I had kinda suspected he was a cock sucker but didn't put much stock in my suspicions and before his declaration, he'd never really given me any indication that he was down like that.

As he sucked me, I blinked... and had what I call a moment of absolute clarity to hear that voice in my head saying, "There's a guy between your legs and sucking your dick..." and with that announcement, all of the prohibitions and the taboo flashed through my mind but I just shoved it aside... but now I'm just watching him blow me. I felt... detached and like I was watching him suck someone else's dick... but I was also in the moment despite having the reality of the situation put me into this peculiar state of mind.

I was "clinically" thinking about how good his mouth felt on me; how he fondled my balls with a gentle urgency and how, at times, he'd go lower and suck them with that same gentle urgency. I was thinking about his finger rubbing my hole, which felt nice but since he'd not thought or bothered to wet that finger - and he certainly had enough saliva cascading down my cock shaft to get it good and wet - the heat producing friction was nice but irritating.

I watched as he took me deep; very much noticed how his nostrils flared so he could breathe; saw the concentration on his face as well as the beads of sweat that would appear on his forehead then trickle downward and threatening to get into his eyes. I watched him back way off until only the head of my dick was in his mouth; watched him with detached interest as he licked and sucked my knob with growing urgency. I looked further down and saw his own prick which was very hard and bouncing around with all of his movements; I knew I wanted to suck him and knew that I would and for a brief moment, I had to smile to myself when I had reached for his dick to stroke it, he actually slapped my hand and with my dick in his mouth, gave me a very stern look that said, "Hands off!"

I found myself wondering what he was thinking about as he sucked me from tip to base, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly; sometimes with that same gentle urgency I was finding to my liking... and sometimes hard enough to shake my stomach up just a little bit. I liked that he was so very much into sucking my dick... and didn't like that I was paying such close attention to what he was doing being in that moment of absolute clarity.[/SIZE][/FONT]