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[COLOR=#303030][FONT=Roboto]This is true. I went to an adult theater in Palm Beach to get some dick..There are only two theaters one gay and one straight but both equally fun. I was wearing some gym shorts that I had cut the lining out and a tshirt. I went in the gay side and stood next to this guy. I slowly moved my hand to his dick. He reached over and kissed me and pulled me to him then push me down on my knees. He pulled his pants down and revealed one sweet cock. I started to suck him and he put his hands on my head so I would go deep. There were other guys there watching. After a few minutes of sucking he had me stand. He pulled my tshirt over my head and pulled my shorts down and off. I was naked. He gave me my clothes and grabbed my dick. He lead me from the gay theater to the straight one. Guys were in there and most took a good look as we came in. He took me to a back row where guys usually set looking for some action. He took me to one guy and offered my service. I was on my knees again this time sucking a nice but small cock. After him he moved me to another guy and another until I had sucked off five guys. He had me suck him again and he shot a huge load in my mouth that he had me swallow. He left. That was so much fun and so hot and so true.[/FONT][/COLOR]

I watched a film recently called Boy Erased which confronts the practise of conversion therapy. For those that haven't heard this term before, it's the practise of converting a person's sexuality from bi/homosexual to heterosexual using religion as a means to "re-educate" the individual. I thought this "therapy" had died out many years ago but it seems it's still alive and well, practised in 38 states in America if I remember rightly. Parents send their children to these "clinics" where men with no formal training, qualifications or real experience "treat" them. It was quite shocking on a number of levels, the fanaticism level of those preaching their religious rhetoric and the fact that parents would trust the physical and mental well-being of their children with these nut cases.

The movie made a number of claims that bisexuality and homosexuality are choices. It uses the metaphor that no one is born a footballer, they learn to be a footballer so therefore no one is born bisexual or homosexual, it's their upbringing and family life that cause it. You may not be born a footballer, but you may be born genetically "gifted" to be predisposed to be good at sport and therefore become a footballer so whilst you weren't born to be a sports person your genetics may lead you there. The choice for them is whether or not they want to play football regardless if they're good at it or not. I feel for me, this is the same when it comes to my sexuality. I believe my genetics predisposed me to same sex attraction and the only choice I had was to whether or not to accept it and act upon it. For many years I would not accept it, I pushed it to the back of my mind but genetics are a hard thing to fight. I didn't learn to have same sex tendencies nor did anyone make me have them. I just had them and I had them from as early as I can remember.

In NZ, conversion therapy costs $200+ per hour according to the article I found and is still legal. The government had looked at banning it but thought this would be a ban on religious freedom and it seems protecting the rights of the individual never came in to the decision making process. Children are often sent to these "camps" against their will. I find this appalling for a country that is supposed to be a world leader in LGTBQ rights. I personally believe it should be banned! It's claiming there is something wrong with being bisexual or homosexual but there is nothing wrong with being either. It's nature.

Had my parents sent me to one of these camps when I was growing up had they ever had an inclining of my true sexuality it would not have worked one iota. Preaching the bible to me would have the opposite effect, you'd be better of hitting me with it. It seems for this to work, the individual must have a strong religious upbringing so that can then be used against them. I did not have this and besides, my parents, whilst I'd believe they'd be disappointed to have a bisexual son, would never had entertained such a barbaric idea. As an adult, there's simply no chance I'd ever consider it. I'm not broken! I'm bisexual!

Unfortunately for the teenage boy in the movie, his parents weren't as liberal as mine and sent them to one such camp when he finally had the courage to tell them he was gay, I wish I had that courage. Did it work? No. He left. He saw it for what it really was, a sham and an expensive one at that. The toll it takes on the boys in the movie is obvious, with one committing suicide after he was beaten by his parents with a bible after falling for temptation. This camp did not allow pornography, physical touching or masturbation but it's not made clear which temptation he fell for. I'm particularly screwed on that last one, they'd definitely get me on it. The movie had quite an ironic ending with the leader of the camp leaving and moving to another state to live with his husband. Yes, it was a true story and for the teenage boy, he confronted his father a few years later with an ultimatum, except him for who he is, a gay man or not be a part of his life. His father chose to try and accept his child instead of never seeing him again.

How would have you felt had your parents sent you to conversion therapy? Would've it worked? Should it be banned?

I once asked a question on the forums that if you were able to take a pill to become straight, would you? I said I wouldn't. I still wouldn't. It's taken me a long time to see that I'm not broken. I'm just different.... but really am I that different? How many have buried such feelings and desires like I had over the years? As humans we form close relationships all the time with the same sex, how many would have the potential of turning in to something else if there wasn't anything metaphysical or societal to stop us? I guess we'll never know. I often feel that the only difference between many men and I is that I have accepted and embraced my same sex attraction and that this attraction may be quite a bit stronger. Some people believe that everyone is innately bisexual, I'm starting to subscribe to that notion, controversial as it is, but that's a blog for another time.

[FONT=Calibri][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000000]Prior to being married I identified as bisexual, but since then I’m increasingly only attracted to men though I am married to a woman. My attraction is more physical, emotional and sensual than exclusively sexual.
[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=Calibri][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000000]Around age 10 I fantasized about sex with men and I had my first homosexual experience with my older cousin at age 13. I assumed I was gay through high school then dated women as it seemed much easier to hide my attraction to men through my 20’s. But fought it thinking it was a phase that I’d grow out of: I didn’t grow out of it. In my early 30’s I had a loving affair with a gay man and came out as gay to my close friends, despite being married to a woman.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Calibri][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000000]Although, I can recognize an attractive woman and have a loving relationship with my wife I’m not sexually attracted to women, only men. Now I exclusively identify as homosexual. I’d say with pretty certain confidence that my sexuality is fixed and quite sure my homosexual desires were innate. I don’t relate to those who suggest it’s the person you fall in love with, not their gender. To me falling in love involves sexual attraction and for me that is only ever going to be with men.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Calibri][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000000]Kinsey Rating: Six[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[QUOTE=boyfox;294066][FONT=Calibri][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]I'm totally into men after I began noticing that I was increasing getting more emotional with men during sexual intimacy and experiencing feelings of love with a man after dating him a few times. [/FONT]
While I felt not so much with women as I couldn’t stay hard when fucking them. I would get in and I wouldn’t feel anything, no intimacy and feel myself softening up as compared to with guys I felt I would never stop orgasming. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[/QUOTE]

This event has been the most influential experience in terms of my sexual development and my sex life.

It was a month before my 12th birthday, and also about a month after my new big 8 inch adult dick appeared virtually overnight (not literally but not too far from it). Too soon for my initial obsession and love affair with my new big dick to wear off, and also long enough for my new single minded focus on my big dick to spread and turn into natural early adolescent curiosity and attraction to other dicks on other boys and to the rest of the cutest boys at school as well. I had two boy crushes in full gear when this bizarre day came.

This is a totally true and also a very long story because I remember so many details clearly more than 40 years later. I want - and I also should and probably need - to write that long version to get it all out from inside me where I've locked it up for so long. But the long version will need to wait for another day. Here is the short version but it's got all you readers need to get what happened to me.

My dad's uncle was visiting us that year from the Old Country. He spent about 10 days with my family. Christmas through New Year and a couple more days on both sides. He was about 70 years old and he was extremely ugly looking too. His wife and two kids stayed back at home so he visited us alone - by himself.

My dad told me many times that he was his favorite uncle of all. I met him twice before when we visited Europe on vacation. Hello and maybe a few words of small talk if that. But nothing more. His visit was a non-event for me since I was still only 11 and too busy for him and anyone or anything else that got in the way of me jerking off my new and big 8 inch dick. All his visit would mean to me was I had to give up my room for 10 days and sleep on the couch in the den. Which was where our TV was so this was an even trade off for me.

This old troll spoke zero English. That plus his advanced age were the two reasons he asked my parents if I could escort him to NY City so he could see the usual tourist sights. I was a smart mature kid and I knew the city well from our many family trips to NYC and my parents trusted me on this so they told me about my great uncle's request and asked if I would do them a big favor and take him to the city for a day. They said neither my mom or dad could do it since they both had to work all that week and New Years was on the weekend that year and he was going back home the following Monday.

I wasn't thrilled to be stuck for an entire day with this ugly old troll who was ignoring me totally up to then, but I had nothing else to do and I knew my parents really needed me to fill in for them so that this uncle dude could see all the famous NY landmarks. I said yes sure I'll do it - more out of a sense of duty to my parents and not at all because I wanted to see these same tourist sites I'd already seen many times once again with this old fart.

And that's how the old fart uncle from the old country tricked my mom and my dad into me. The stuff about wanting to see all the NY sights was 100% total lie and complete bullshit. As I was to find out myself the next day.

The train to the city took about 50 minutes. I tried to chat him up once or twice but he had no interest in that or in me either which I already sensed and confirmed during the ride.

We get to the city and we walk up the stairs to street level and it's time for me to play tour guide for this man. Every tourist site was to our left which I said to him and pointed us that way but after I took two steps I looked back at him and he was standing still and pointing to the right. The wrong and totally opposite direction. I tried to tell him that but he cut me off and all he said to me was this: "just follow me and do whatever I tell you to do for the rest of the day." Rude but not shocking from this old asshole. And I had no clue where he was leading us.

I found out the answer to that about 10 minutes later. When we got to the Times Square Red Light District. This was back in 1972 when Times Square was the sleazy cheap sex pervert runaway drug addict capital of the world.

This was the one and only NY "tourist sight" my great uncle gave a fuck about. For the next 4 or 5 hours he trolled every porn shop and peep show, going inside each one to sit alone in a booth and suck every dick that came his way through the glory holes on both walls to his left and his right. And he dumped me out front of each joint, telling me to stay there and not go anywhere else until he came back out so he could go to the next one and do the same thing. Which he did all fucking day. And I was an 11 year old stranded by my blood relative all fucking day, freezing my ass off in the late December NY city winter cold.

Back then every porn shop in Times Square covered its front windows and door with huge sheets of white paper so nobody outside could get a free look at the dirty pictures that covered every wall of every porn joint. But these white sheets didn't cover all of any of the windows - there was always a small uncovered part at the edges and the corners of all of them. Half or one inch and a few of them two inches they left exposed and which a horny man or a curious very horny 11 year old boy with a month old 8 inch dick could peek into.

Before that day I'd seen a few Playboys that my friends found in their dad's closets and the pretty girls with big tits inside them - tits, ass, and always wearing panties or a bikini bottom. The truth is I wasn't as innocent as that seems but net net I never saw a girl's pussy before then and definitely no hard core porn of people fucking or sucking or licking.

But on this fucked up day I saw everything there is in porn involving people. Five minutes of me standing alone outside porn joint number 1 of that day got me past the initial shock phase and into the curious and horny phase. I looked into every window and stood right in front of every door so I could see as much porn as one inch of window crack plus two seconds of open door would allow me to see.

I'll skip all the rest except this: I saw gay porn inside the 4th or 5th porn shop. Black on white gay porn and the black dude was cute and he had a hot long lean body and his dick was fucking huge. 11 inches at least and probably more of that black dick. The sexual thrill almost made me fall over and this bizarre first exposure to gay sex brought out all my gay desires - and all at once. From zero to max in 3 seconds or less. I actually jerked off right there - outdoors with my eyes staring at those gay shots and at that huge black dick, in broad daylight with hundreds or thousands of others walking past me as I rubbed my dick through my pants with my zipper down and my winter jacket covering it all up. Came in my briefs and jerked off a second time 10 minutes later.

Traumatic overwhelming abusive age inappropriate bizarre and unbelievably sexually thrilling way for an innocent but horny 11 year old boy with a new big 8 inch dick of his own to be introduced to gay sex and also to his own unrealized before then gay urges still inside him up till then. Sexual initiation by jerking off in public to gay porn on the walls of a sleazy porn shop. In 1972 Times Square!!!

If you or anyone you know had an initiation or first introduction to sex as a kid or early teenager that was anywhere close to this bizarre, please drop me a note.

Thank you all for reading my short version. The full version will follow and hopefully soon.

Is it normal to be straight and have a sexual attraction to men. I think about men sometimes when I masturbate but a lot of the time it's women. Am I bi? I'm married and love having sex with my wife. Also I've never wanted to be with a man in real life it never seemed to turn me on the thought of actually doing being with a man.. Is this normal or what...?