I was questioning for so long by the time I tasted my first man I knew I was ready for more, not 100% but knew if the right safe guy came along who was handsome and right for me I would move quickly, I checked personal ads and found a and met a couple gay guys I hooked up with with no hesitation, once I knew I wanted and craved cock it was a done deal, I wouldn't cheat on my then girlfriend to do it so broke up with her and posted a person ad on a dating site, what a waste of F'ing time, all these older guys and their secrets and lies, I am very clear I don't want anyone in the closet or questioning, testing the waters, but yet, every single one of the replies are vague, or you have to drag things out of them, then they admit they have a partner, so while I understand being nervous or questioning, if you jerk off to cock and only think about men, which I did while with women, once you get a taste and decide you want more, be honest like I was and tell your suitor your situation, lots of guys are willing to let you test the waters. But I can see why most gay guys stay away from straight dudes and bi's, it's all wishing and wondering. If you say you are bo or gay, don't waste peoples time, be honest if you messaged them, and stop with the likes or matches, just freakin say hi and what you are hoping to do, ask men what they prefer in bed, don't just say hi there and expect us to drag it out of you, you're the one reaching out, say something, say too much if you need to, don't be a mute.
As a society in general, the term date, along with dating has been so overused, there is no meaning to the word. Dictionaries can define the word, but those definitions are useless today, and have been useless for a long time. Recently, I joined a "traditional" dating site. I put the word traditional in quotes, because it is your standard dating for serious people looking for long term relationships, yada-yada. It is a paid site. My rational, and reason, being if someone is on the site, that woman is serious about actually meeting a man. Sad part, nothing for actual bisexual dating. Who says I don't want to date men? Just not romantically, which is why I put "traditional" in quotes. This is where I get into the concept of non-traditional dating. Hook ups, fuck buddies, and booty calls are not really relationships, and would in some sense not fall under the whole concept of dating. I spent the money for three months on the "traditional" site. After two weeks, only one response from a woman. I keep journals of sorts when I am dating. Thoughts, feelings, any information my future self might find pertinent. So far, things are the same as my past self wrote about. It is a numbers game. This is why I only gave myself three months. After that point, all the women I am interested in have been emailed, and no response means not interested. The women whom responded I have met personally or been stood up, and I have either entered into a relationship or I am still single. At three months the dating sites are not getting enough "new" women joining to be worth the effort to send an email. Women on the "traditional" dating site have their own ideas, and so I might not fall into what they want. I would say maybe one out of every three women I view conform to my concept of someone I might want to date. Given that I might fall into an even smaller percentage of a woman's concept of what she wants to date, the odds overall are slim for a response. As stated above, I only gave myself three months, because this is where the odds will nose dive into near nothing of getting a response. One of the things dating sites do is allow people to join for free. "Freeloaders" is the term I use for these people. Really insulting on dating sites where one pays, you can pay for "freeloaders" to contact you. WTF? Dating sites use freeloaders to pump up the numbers. Millions of people have joined our site. Really? How many are freeloaders? Dating sites won't tell you. Because paying people are dumb enough to pay, are they dumb enough to pay more? Maybe? Not me. Been there, done that. The only time I might pay for a "freeloader" to contact me is if I am on a non-traditional dating site. A hookup site. The concept that someone is not good enough to fuck because they are too cheap to pay is stupid. The person might be serious about sex, but not dating. Follow my thoughts for a moment. A person on a traditional site is not really serious if that person is not going to pay. If someone is joining a traditional dating site for free and counting on someone else paying, that person is fishing. Fishing for someone gullible and willing to spend money to meet someone. Which translates into spending money to woo and scrape and bow. Sucker. A person on a non-traditional site whom is not willing to pay might be serious about hooking up, that person is seeing how serious you are willing to hookup. People on hookup sites play different games. My thoughts at the time of joining a dating site was to join both a traditional site and non-traditional site to see what type of response I get. Paying for freeloaders on the non-traditional site as well. Reality set in, in the world of financial outlay. Granted the money per month is small, but all dating sites make you pay the three months up front for the savings. Now it gets expensive. Joining month to month is much more expensive when you are only giving yourself a certain time frame. If things do not work out for the traditional dating site within a certain length of time, I have already decided to join a non-traditional site. This time, I will join as a bisexual instead of just heterosexual. Thoughts and comments welcome, I do not come onto this site as often as I want, so I may not respond promptly.
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last night i was thinking about how i have been so unsuccessfull with women & i began to think about my curiosities with guys. sometimes i think i have got these curiosities as a way to deal with the lack of female attention in my life & try & have some kinda excitement in my life, but what if it's the other way around? what i mean is, this might be something i have gotta explore & be satisfied with knowing before i can proceed with nething meaningfull with a women. i kinda pictured myself in getting to know a women knowing i have these unresolved curiosities. if i say nothing about it & go forward with being with her she might be more than enough for me & i would totally loose interest in intimacy with ne1 else. but my fear is that curiosity would never go away & as i have thought about it more over the years i'm getting more convinced that would be likely. when i 1st started to get bicurious years ago it would last awhile & then it would go away, each time i thought it was just a phase & it would be the last time. but as time went on & i accepted having such different feelings i began to accept that those feelings would come back. it's unlikely marriage would supress these feelings. so how could i go into a deep comitted relationship with a women with this curiosity that's nagging me & be @ peace? i'm restless enough about it while being single lol. from another viewpoint what if i was getting closer with a girl & she revealed the same kinda unresolved curiosities? of course i would encourage her to find herself & be open to a new experiance, but of course it would probably hinder our relationship & possibly threaten us growing apart. so why would i open myself to getting involved with a girl & say oh by the way i wonder what it would be like to bed a guy or worse bury those desires deep down? i have gotta get this in order 1st & be @ peace before i can open myself to deep involvement with a girl. plus most guys i have talked too about this love it, but some didn't like it @ all. but none of them said they regretted trying. they say something like to get something u have never had u have gotta do something u have never done. it looks like it's clear what i have gotta do. now the problem like it has been, is how to look for the right kinda guy?
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