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  1. #1

    Understanding Transgender people

    woohoo.... these are the people that most intrique me.....mysterious and so beautiful, inside and out....they are one of the most misunderstood groups of people in the world

    TG or transgender people are part of the group that are known by the terms * inter sexual, contra sexual and the third sex*

    trans gender are classed as gender challenged.... or simply people that feel they are in the wrong body...... and what a sad mistake society makes, with that label

    TG, are people that feel, relate and understand in a way that is different to the normal traits associated with their gender.....and so they are not seen or acknowledged as to who they are based on their understanding and feelings.... but by their gender....
    most cases are of M2F transgender... but in fact F2M transgender do exist... just not as publicly

    most TG don't state their case as being born in the wrong body.... but in fact that their body is not suitable for who they are as a person, and therefore, it needs to be changed to better reflect the person inside

    and that comes the most difficult question of, is a transgender, a bisexual, gay or lesbian....
    now to be considerate of the TG.. the correct answer normally is based around the sex of the person within... not the gender of the body....

    a post op M2F TG that wishs to form a relationship with a male.... sees themselves as a lady wishing to bond with a male...hence heterosexual..... and not gay as society would dictate.... gay is M2M...
    a post op TG that is now 100% female... doesn't wanna be addressed as SIR... and doesn't wish to be classed as gay
    but that is not to say that a TG can't have GRS ( gender reassignment surgery ) and become a lady... and still be gay inside....or even bisexual

    sexuality is defined by the sex that attracts you...and its possible to be a lady but attracted to guys as a guy....
    even tho your body has changed... your desires and attractions can remain the same.....

    sadly the legal terms and BS that surround TG needs to reflect the person within... and often they face the battle of becoming the sex of the person within, against a legal system that is neither caring nor compassionate

    often we hear the term she male..... and this is a very narrow term applied to a broad range of people
    she male generally refers to a pre op TG M2F..... but it also covers TG that have had hormone therapy and breast enhancements.... but do not desire losing the male genitalia....or people with a condition known as gynemimesis or female impersonation in a male who is able to relate sexually exclusively with men, and who may be hormonally but not surgically sex-reassigned

    Andromimetophilia is when a woman is sexually aroused by impersonating a man. They purposefully look like and act like a man,


    nothing i write, can do justice to the inner soul of a TG... and sadly, misunderstanding of a TG is very common.....

    over the years i have worked with and befriended many cd/ tv /tg people....and to see the inner soul of them is incredible......
    we are born male or female as a rule and grow up as one......
    but for a cd / tv / tg... they are like young children taking their first steps..... and when they become the sex they feel more content as, they glow with a beauty that is not possible to define in words

    in nz, i had the chance to see that with a young person that fought in court for the right to become who they truly were and at 16 they ended their life as a male and started life as a lady... 4 hours after the surgery... the smile on their face, lit up the room..... until the day i die.... i will never forget that look and smile of total happiness.....

    now one thing that pisses me right off...is the fact that TG are referred to as people with Gender Identity Disorder ....

    BULLSHIT.......questioning your gender or sexuality is NOT a disorder and I don't care what anybody says........the experience of learning and understanding is NOT a disorder.... unless you wanna count every day in school as a DISORDER

    a disorder is a inability to act, function or live in a normal manner......its natural and normal for TG to question their gender...... it is classed as a disorder by somebody that believed that each person should NOT question their gender and seek to become another gender

    now i know that in the eyes of the psych community, i am wrong.... that TG is classed as a disorder..... but this is my post and they can get fucked.... I am not telling any TG that they have a disorder or that they are in need of therapy.... they are in need of support, understanding and help to make the best decisions for themselves


    having seen some of the most gorgeous TG ladies.... and yes, some ladies that look more masculine than feminine even after surgery......it is often a pleasure to see them as content with their bodies as possible.....
    the old saying that * the inner beauty is what makes the outside beautiful *...is indeed very true in the case of the TG... and true as well in the case of any person

    to call a TG a freak or a pervert, is to show a lack of understanding for a persons inner struggle to find peace into themselves....

    in the cases in which i have found myself in a bar with TG friends, and dealing with pre historic mankind.... hell bent on * dealing to the freaks *... i am often heard to make the remark about how mr neanderthal's partner must love beastiality.... cos to fuck a half evolved ape with the brain the size of my left nut, would take a person with a deep love of beastiality and severe mental retardation.....

    I am very proud of my TG friends ... they walk a hard path.... and earn my respect greatly....and they treat me with the respect and love that i happily return 10 fold.... even if it does mean that i get banned from the local bar for * animal training *....lol

    so give a TG person a hug and a smile, and let them know that you understand a lil better.... but you now love them so much more lol

  2. #2
    Azrael
    Guest

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    I've been known to cross dress in the past. This has caused my family and I to have a falling out. It's not that I want to be a woman or hate being a male, it's just fun to step outside of yourself and juxtapose your perspective by pretending a little. I had a nervous breakdown and spent 6 weeks in a mental hospital. Up til that point I was reveling in my out-ness and dressing how I wanted and not giving a shit. My family assumed I must be crazy because I was sexually confused, which was not the case. I know who the hell I am and what I like to do. It's taken me the better part of my life to figure this out. Yep, I'm a skilled tradesman who likes to wear cotton panties. And I'm ok with this.

  3. #3

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Thank you for a most interesting and insightful article. I guess what it all comes down to is that every person has the right to be treated with respect and dignity. We all go through our lives with challenges, meeting those challenges is not always the easiest task. I often think that one is not given a challenge that you can not handle. That being said, someone striving to attain the sense of completeness they long for, may be far stronger than either you or I.

    I have firmly believed that it is what is inside a personal soul is important and not the body that it happens to be encased in. Alligning the soul and the correct body can make anyone feel as one. If you love someone who may be facing the challenge, I can hardly imagine that you would love them any less.

    Just my thoughts........

    Belle

  4. #4

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    LDD, thanks for the post that was great.


    You have it right.

    Thanks again,

    Marie
    The third-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the majority. The second-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the minority. The first-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking.
    —A. A. Milne
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7E-aoXLZGY

  5. #5

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Great post Long Duck Dong. It would be a great thing if there was more info made available to people about Transgender. Especially TG youth, as you probably know from my earlier post (the one about bisexuality and gender perception) I am mildly TG and I also cross-dress occasionally. I have known about this/ been CDing since I was about 13 or so and it was only that I was able to find any info about it until I was 16. Basically I saw Eddie Izzard on an episode of 'Top Gear' and thought...."wow, another transvestite" and started researching him etc... [I am still a huge fan of him, hence the name 'Izzfan']. But for those 3 years I thought myself to be evil/peverted/abnormal/mad etc... just for getting dressed up every now and then [I still have a certain sense of paranoia/self-loathing -This leads to a kind of vicious circle where, when I'm out in public, I don't look anyone in the eye/ think that everyone knows about me and thinks I'm some sort of pervert etc... and this then leads to me getting nervous and actually looking suspicious and furtive which probably does make me look somewhat deviant] Now, if I had got information about it which said that it was perfectly normal [I still have problems accepting myself as 'normal'] when I was 13/14 then I would probably be in a much better state than I am now. Also the fact that I went to a mildly religious school and (knowingly) had no LGBT friends until I was 18 probably didn't help either, the closet is an unhealthy place to be. Nevertheless, I am generally more 'open' about being bisexual than I am about being TG/TV [I only knew that I was bisexual when I was 17/18...although, it probably existed in a latent form long before that].
    Azreal I really feel sorry that your family was so intolerant of your gender/sexuality. I think you sum up one of the aspects of cross-dressing quite well - the escape of being someone else for a short time, I've never quite thought of it in that way before but its a very good observation with a lot of truth in it.

    Izzfan
    "World out of balance
    World without end
    We are not afraid
    Let the night come..."

    -Poppy Z. Brite

  6. #6

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Good post LDD. I like the fact that you as well as others here think it's really about who we feel we are inside and not so much the bodies that we are born with. I have to ask though, what's the difference between TV and TG? I've done a little research on my own about TG individuals but I haven't been able to get a clear understanding on the difference between TV and TG, if there is any. I've also came across TG message boards where they refer to themselves as androgynes or androgynes that refer to themselves as transgender, has anyone else came across this?
    gentlepen9
    If I can open up one person's eyes to other possibilities, then I'm happy.

  7. #7

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    this is a subject that has really caught my attention as of late. mostly because i know that i somehow fit into the transgender and/or transsexual catagory. just not quite sure yet exacthly how. yesterday, i was practically glued to my computer all day and all night, reading up on some websites and learning more about what causes one to feel trans, and what actions can be taken to accept, explore and even love and appreciate this side of me.

    obviously there are two extemes.. there's the guy that gets a kick out of wearing women's panties now and then.. and then there's the guy that complety transforms into a woman in every shape and form, physically, menally, socially, etc..

    i'd like to share two websites with anyone who's intereted in learning more.

    http://www.reneereyes.com/

    this lovely "girl" really focuses on the value of embrasing both the man and woman inside herself. Lots of details about how to go about living normal every day life as a man, but transforming into a woman for friday nights.


    http://nikaaskini.com/

    this lovely young "girl" underwent full transition during teen and early 20s. Lots of great info regarding the feelings and the transition process.

    Also, lots of great details that discuss how sexuality and genitals are only a very small part of what makes up a transexual. and how one can still essentially become entirely woman even though they maintain their penis. (and heck, i agree, why should anyone have to give up their penis, and more importantly, give up orgasms in order to become woman??)

    spending time reading their stories really touched my heart and really helped me understand that i am not alone in the feelings i have..

    i really have no idea as to exactly how far i want or need to go in terms of transitioning, but i'm just happy to be able to officially accept that this is something that is a part of me and a part of my future..

    what makes it even more interesting for me, is my bisexuality.

    my future is scary, yet exciting. and if there are any trans on this site, i'd love to hear from you..

  8. #8

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Just one last thing a video for those of you that might be interested in it

    From TransYouth Family Advocates - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1LPs8sE4M0&NR


    Take care all

    Marie
    The third-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the majority. The second-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the minority. The first-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking.
    —A. A. Milne
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7E-aoXLZGY

  9. #9

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    why do we have to choose between ?
    I'm
    I don't know of any heterosexual who would keep it a secret
    that they are attracted to, and date, the opposite sex
    .

    So why should I
    keep my orientation

    secret?

  10. #10

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Gentlepen 9, you asked what the difference between TV and TG is, I'll try to provide a definintion (I hope its accurate, if it isn't then feel free to correct me)

    -TV = Transvestite/crossdresser (CD): a person who likes to dress/appear like the opposite sex. some people dress fully, some don't, some dress in public and 'pass' as a member of the opposite sex, others dress in private and remain in the closet, CD/TV come from all sexualities and many do not want SRS [sexual reassignment surgery - a sex change] although most Transexuals(TS) [people who take it further through surgery, hormones or both] will cross dress, this can be seen as different to the average TV/CD who only usually dresses occasionally

    - TG = Transgender (TG): This is a rather broad term that describes the whole range of things from TV-TS etc... basically an umbrella term that describes anything that crosses gender boundaries

    Izzfan
    "World out of balance
    World without end
    We are not afraid
    Let the night come..."

    -Poppy Z. Brite

  11. #11

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Thanks izzfan, I get it now.
    gentlepen9
    If I can open up one person's eyes to other possibilities, then I'm happy.

  12. #12

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    i am not a ts but am a transvestite i have been wearing female clothes since the age of 8 so i guess i have been doing it for 49 years now and will go on till i leave this world. unlike some on this chat i do not decieve anyone if i am pvtm i always ask if the party has seen my profile. i tell them that i am a male and if they care to continue that is fine with me if not i am fine with that as well. my wife knows about barbara and is comfrotable with it. i do not go out dressed but take my things if i have a date in a motel. it works for me and my wife. when i started wearing femine things it was a lot worse than it is today. if you where caught bad things would happen to you. i think todays society is becoming tolerant of peoples habits and desires. if you don't understand a situation you should ask someone that is in the situation and if you are not humiliating someone they usually will talk about themselves to you. i do not know anyone that likes to be ridiculed for what they do. lighten up world we are not going away anytime soon

  13. #13

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    WOW! LDD, once again you have hit the nail on the proverbial head. Although i am not a Transgendered person (someone who has gone on to have sexual reassignment surgery) i am a Transvestite and strongly identify with my femininity, i.e. i behave much as a Genetic Woman does although not in any constant form because of the life i have chosen (family etc.). I have evolved this way from a child and continue to do so with the acceptance of the most wonderful woman in the world who has loved and supported me.

    I have heard just about all of it, the ignorance, the hatred but even the accepting. It is extremely important to hear such oppenness on this site as it reaffirms my faith in human kind and their ability to open up to new things and ideas without having to necessarily apply to that particular view and without bowing to peer pressure. Not everyone is like me i know and i am not everyone else but i do know, when i am Danielle, i am extremly happy and at peace with myself and that is important. I have learned that someone denied, is someone who is embattled. Nothing worse than being denied by society, family or one who is the closest to you. Because of the acceptance i have received in my lifetime, i am more apt in my life to say "so what? whom are you hurting, go in peace and live your life the way you wish"

    This site seems to be all about that, about standing on a mountain and shouting "I AM......." and that's wonderful, but even more wonderful is the echo coming back from the valley and hearing "and that's ok!"


    I love you all.............Dani

  14. #14

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Quote Originally Posted by Danielle_T
    WOW! LDD, once again you have hit the nail on the proverbial head. Although i am not a Transgendered person (someone who has gone on to have sexual reassignment surgery) i am a Transvestite and strongly identify with my femininity, i.e. i behave much as a Genetic Woman does although not in any constant form because of the life i have chosen (family etc.). I have evolved this way from a child and continue to do so with the acceptance of the most wonderful woman in the world who has loved and supported me.

    I have heard just about all of it, the ignorance, the hatred but even the accepting. It is extremely important to hear such oppenness on this site as it reaffirms my faith in human kind and their ability to open up to new things and ideas without having to necessarily apply to that particular view and without bowing to peer pressure. Not everyone is like me i know and i am not everyone else but i do know, when i am Danielle, i am extremly happy and at peace with myself and that is important. I have learned that someone denied, is someone who is embattled. Nothing worse than being denied by society, family or one who is the closest to you. Because of the acceptance i have received in my lifetime, i am more apt in my life to say "so what? whom are you hurting, go in peace and live your life the way you wish"

    This site seems to be all about that, about standing on a mountain and shouting "I AM......." and that's wonderful, but even more wonderful is the echo coming back from the valley and hearing "and that's ok!"


    I love you all.............Dani
    The world would be a darker place without Dani

  15. #15

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    LDD you're my fucking hero. Thanks for writing this and making people think, even if it was just for a minute.
    M

    The important work of moving the world forward does not wait to be done by perfect men. ~ George Elliot

  16. #16

    Wink Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGuy2007
    Lots of great info regarding the feelings and the transition process. Also, lots of great details that discuss how sexuality and genitals are only a very small part of what makes up a transsexual. and how one can still essentially become entirely woman even though they maintain their penis. (and heck, i agree, why should anyone have to give up their penis, and more importantly, give up orgasms in order to become woman??)
    I don't think that that's what quite they were saying; as far as I know, the ability to experience pleasure sexually after SRS (sexual reassignment surgery) varies widely depending on the quality of the surgery itself. Some SRS doctors do attempt to take the various nerve endings and reposition them to where they should be in the female anatomy (clitoris, and to a lesser extent the vagina).

    The issue that Renée's site raised was one of the large doses of hormone replacement therapy (HRT) being prescribed to some patients while still in the pre-operative state.

    At some point in transition, the old 'boy parts' are still there but hormone levels have been manipulated through prescription of female hormones (typically menopause-treatment drugs, but at much higher doses). More drugs are prescribed to suppress the effects of existing male hormones (androcur and spiroactelone I think were the usual ones).

    Push the levels of hormones far enough, and the male anatomy parts shrink somewhat and dangle limply and uselessly. The level of sexual desire may also drop dramatically. Sometimes, medicines like Viagra can compensate for some of these effects - if not, orgasm becomes difficult as the male parts are still there but not fully functional.

    I think that's the point she's addressing, although things not working at this point don't necessarily indicate whether they'll work (with newly surgically-reconstructed female anatomy) after SRS.

    There are a couple of other contexts where things could become awkward:
    * At the beginning of transition, the male parts are still there but some patients do feel strongly enough that they don't want to be in any way male that they don't want to use these bits in any sexual context.
    * At the end of the process, if the patient is a m2f married to a heterosexual female, then predictably much of what worked sexually before transition no longer fits together quite the same way.

    It may well be that only a minority ultimately go the SRS route. It's medically intrusive and dreadfully expensive (tens of thousands of dollars) for something which, after all, is plastic surgery on just one small portion of the anatomy. SRS therefore does not in any way equal ability to 'pass' as one's intended gender. It doesn't change the voice, the face or anything else - and any additional procedures to do the rest of this inevitably cost extra.

    Typically, standards of care require one year minimum living full time <i>en femme</i> before SRS will even be considered. It's just the last step in a long process, nothing more.

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGuy2007
    Spending time reading their stories really touched my heart and really helped me understand that I am not alone in the feelings I have.
    At least with the Internet, the message that urnotalone is finally getting out there.

    For a gay or lesbian organization adding a 'T' to their acronymed name to somehow be expected to suddenly know all about transgender issues, after all, seems unrealistic. At least for the TS's, much of this is very medicalised - everything from psychology and endrocrinology to plastic surgery - and in many ways more complex than the "how do I meet anyone" and "will my parents disown me" questions that usually get addressed to a local gayline.

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGuy2007
    I really have no idea as to exactly how far I want or need to go in terms of transitioning, but I'm just happy to be able to officially accept that this is something that is a part of me and a part of my future.
    In that case, something like wildside.org might be a better starting point than the whole medical SRS track. There, presumably the clothes make the woman, but nothing is actually permanently changed. Just a chance to go out «en femme» and see how it feels, like trying out any other piece of new wardrobe. If you were at a point where psychologically you will have to make permanent medical changes (electrolysis, hormones, plastic surgery) you'd know it... perhaps being aware of it to the point of obsession.

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGuy2007
    What makes it even more interesting for me, is my bisexuality.
    My future is scary, yet exciting. and if there are any trans on this site, I'd love to hear from you..
    All I know is rather second-hand, from being involved with one TS and with one TG, both many years ago. There are plenty of resources both locally in Toronto and online (although the surgery itself is done in Montréal or abroad) so hopefully you'll find what you're looking for.

  17. #17

    Smile Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    Sadly the legal terms and BS that surround TG needs to reflect the person within... and often they face the battle of becoming the sex of the person within, against a legal system that is neither caring nor compassionate.
    The legal system is just plain weird at times when it comes to deciding at what point it recognises gender transition in some of these cases. I met one gal who was "Ms." in the eyes of her local state government and "Mr." in the eyes of the federal government of the same country. And no, Mr. followed by a female name doesn't do a lady justice.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    Often we hear the term she-male..... and this is a very narrow term applied to a broad range of people she male generally refers to a pre op TG M2F..... but it also covers TG that have had hormone therapy and breast enhancements.... but do not desire losing the male genitalia....or people with a condition known as gynemimesis or female impersonation in a male who is able to relate sexually exclusively with men, and who may be hormonally but not surgically sex-reassigned.
    In any case, "she-male" is an ugly term. She doesn't want to be male. That's the whole point. That this one bit of terminology originated in pornography also doesn't help.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    Nothing I write, can do justice to the inner soul of a TG... and sadly, misunderstanding of a TG is very common.....
    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    Now one thing that pisses me right off...is the fact that TG are referred to as people with Gender Identity Disorder .... BULLSHIT.......questioning your gender or sexuality is NOT a disorder and I don't care what anybody says........the experience of learning and understanding is NOT a disorder.... unless you wanna count every day in school as a DISORDER
    Now this question is an awkward one. The designation is annoying in many ways, but at the same time those who are TS or on an SRS-track sometimes do need to use this as a "look and see, I've been diagnosed with something, now get me this doctor, this doctor, this doctor..." tool.

    Otherwise, this could've been scrapped years ago, much like homosexuality was removed from the DSM III book of possible diagnoses in the 1970's.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    I am very proud of my TG friends ... they walk a hard path.... and earn my respect greatly....and they treat me with the respect and love that i happily return 10 fold.... even if it does mean that i get banned from the local bar for * animal training.
    It's been a while since I've had a TG in my life - I'm in a small town and leading a rather sheltered existence at the moment. Nonetheless, I do remember quite well... if she's had to go through all of this, she's seen both sides - so even though I'm male and she's hyperfeminine, she can see straight through me.

  18. #18

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    I'm chiming in a bit late on this one.. I wanted to offer my perspectives as someone who is trans. I've noticed a lot of the writing on this subject so far has been on the MTF experience. Well, I'm an FTM and I'm a transsexual. I do not define myself as transgendered, because to me, that is a lot different from my own experience.

    I'm going to use Long Duck Dong's comments to respond with my own.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    TG, are people that feel, relate and understand in a way that is different to the normal traits associated with their gender.....and so they are not seen or acknowledged as to who they are based on their understanding and feelings.... but by their gender....
    most cases are of M2F transgender... but in fact F2M transgender do exist... just not as publicly
    F2M or FTM trans people do exist, in almost equal numbers to MTFs. You're right, though... FTMs aren't as visible in the media, largely because we blend in better...

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    most TG don't state their case as being born in the wrong body.... but in fact that their body is not suitable for who they are as a person, and therefore, it needs to be changed to better reflect the person inside
    I think you're meshing terms here.. by my definition and by the definition most TS peope abide by... TG is a person who is gender variant but NOT transsexual. By this, I mean they do NOT typically transition with hormones and surgery.

    And where are you getting this "most TG people..." Are you TG or TS? How can you tell people what WE'RE thinking. Don't get me wrong, I do appreciate your support and I'm very happy to see that you do get it, to a certain degree. So many people do not.


    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    a post op M2F TG that wishs to form a relationship with a male.... sees themselves as a lady wishing to bond with a male...hence heterosexual..... and not gay as society would dictate.... gay is M2M...
    a post op TG that is now 100% female... doesn't wanna be addressed as SIR... and doesn't wish to be classed as gay
    but that is not to say that a TG can't have GRS ( gender reassignment surgery ) and become a lady... and still be gay inside....or even bisexual

    sexuality is defined by the sex that attracts you...and its possible to be a lady but attracted to guys as a guy....
    even tho your body has changed... your desires and attractions can remain the same.....
    I had to read this several times to make sure I understood what you're saying.. You're largely correct, in my opinion -- correction, though a post-op MTF would be a transsexual, not transgendered.

    I saw that Izzman (is that spelled right?) gave some definitions of TV and TG that are pretty much on the nose. The term transgendered is considered by many an umbrella term that encompasses TV/CDs, drag queens, drag kings and transsexuals. Well, many transsexuals disagree. Transsexuals are the folks who physically transition and live full time as the gender they see themselves as. In my case, I am now as legally male as I can be (don't get me started on legal issues.. that's a whole book!)

    In any case, trangendered people are people who are gender variant, but not necessarily transsexual, in that they may not have the desire to actually transition physically.

    Now, back to the point of discussion as quote above. To sum up everything you've said up there... Gender identity is who you are. Sexual orientation is who you are attracted to... your sexual orientation stems from your gender. I'm a guy and i'm bisexual. Anyway, Gender identity is often confused with sexual orientation and it cannot be lumped together in that way.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    sadly the legal terms and BS that surround TG needs to reflect the person within... and often they face the battle of becoming the sex of the person within, against a legal system that is neither caring nor compassionate
    This is true, especially in the U.S. where we rely on state law to get our legal documents changed. Grr... too many variances to make me happy.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    often we hear the term she male..... and this is a very narrow term applied to a broad range of people
    she male generally refers to a pre op TG M2F..... but it also covers TG that have had hormone therapy and breast enhancements.... but do not desire losing the male genitalia....or people with a condition known as gynemimesis or female impersonation in a male who is able to relate sexually exclusively with men, and who may be hormonally but not surgically sex-reassigned
    she-male is a term that i absolutely loathe and will NOT even discuss. Them's fighting words.... it's a derogatory term that originated with PORN. I'm not going there.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    Andromimetophilia is when a woman is sexually aroused by impersonating a man. They purposefully look like and act like a man,
    This is extremely rare, FYI. I've never met anyone that has this condition. Sexual arousal from crossdressing I've seen from the MTF side of the spectrum, but RARELY see from the FTM perspective.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    nothing i write, can do justice to the inner soul of a TG... and sadly, misunderstanding of a TG is very common.....
    Even misunderstandings by some who claim to understand is all too common. No one can truly understand us, unless they walk in our shoes. It's true. Almost the same parallel applies when we try to understand racism when we are white, not black. We cannot understand it from the perspective of a black person because we have not walked in their shoes. But, we CAN and DO emphathize and we CAN be supportive.

    i do commend you on your support of your friends.

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    now one thing that pisses me right off...is the fact that TG are referred to as people with Gender Identity Disorder ....
    I agree. Unfortunately, that diagnosis is what is helping us get the treatment we need. I cannot be so certain that we will have the same access to therapy, medical attention and surgery if we did not have that diagnosis. Before we can remove it from the DSM, we need to have an alternative in place, that will enable us to get at least part of our transition covered by insurance. Most aren't now, except for the therapy and MAYBE hormones. (Insurance issues... another ball of wax).

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    I am very proud of my TG friends ... they walk a hard path.... and earn my respect greatly....and they treat me with the respect and love that i happily return 10 fold.... even if it does mean that i get banned from the local bar for * animal training *....lol

    so give a TG person a hug and a smile, and let them know that you understand a lil better.... but you now love them so much more lol
    Now, this last bit... I adore that. Thank you for being you. If you have questions from the FTM side, let me know.. I'm always happy to help.

    Alex

  19. #19

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    I forgot to add... about genital surgery.

    For BOTH MTFs and FTMs, I think you'll find that for the most part, we would LOVE to have the correct genitals of the gender we identify as. The cost of the surgery often prohibits us from getting what we need.

    Secondly -- MTF surgery is awesome. It's gotten so good that you cannot visibly tell the difference from an MTF vagina and that of a genetic female.

    Unfortunately, FTM genital surgery is not nearly as successful. FTMs have very few options for surgery. One is a freeing of the clitoral hood, which has grown quite a bit from the testosterone we take), the addition of balls and the closing of the vagina. The urethra can be extended so that we can pee with it. Downside.. it's a tiny dick and we can't penetrate with it.

    The other option is a phalloplasty, where a dick is formed using tissue, nerves and skin from another part of the body... most of the time the forearm, because that area is much more sensitive and the most like a natural penis' skin would be.

    Anyway, that tissue is grafted onto the existing clitoris (many of us refer to our clit as a dicklet or a dick)... and again the urethra can be extended out so that we can pee through it. The vagina can be sewn up and we can have balls made through our labia.

    Downside -- it often doesn't look like the real thing... it looks misshapen, to me... and sexual function??? some say it's fine.. some say they can't feel it. Too many variables for me.

    There's a lot of guys out there that opt for the surgery to feel compete with their bodies. There's also a lot of guys out there who feel like I do.. the surgeries available now will NOT make us happy because they're not correct in our minds.

    Now,... I've learned to adapt and accept the parts I have. I don't love them, but I like them better than I used to. Acceptance is far from loving your genitals. When surgery has drastically improved to my satisfaction and I actually have enough money to afford the surgery, I will go for it.

    About sexual sensation...or the sex drive... often that is hormone induced, not a genital thing. Many MTFs actually lose a bit of their sex drive -- not all, but many do. FTMs on the other hand... Most experience a dramatic INCREASE in their sex drives and their genitals become a bit more sensitive than before. It's all hormones.

  20. #20

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Hi Carl, Hi Deaf,

    thanks for adding in your comments to this thread. lots of great ideas and opinions in here..

    all the best

    Jeff

  21. #21

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGuy2007
    Hi Carl, Hi Deaf,

    thanks for adding in your comments to this thread. lots of great ideas and opinions in here..

    all the best

    Jeff
    Thanks, Jeff. I just felt it best to throw in some opinions from an actual transsexual. I naturally can't speak for everyone, but I do know a lot of transpeople and I know how a lot of them feel about things.

    Alex

  22. #22

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    some trans people opt not to have the surgery and just see their being transgender as an aspect of themselves.

    I've talked to trans people (both FTM and MTF) who don't want the surgery because in their opinion it's not that good and it doesn't give them the REAL reproductive organs that they want.

  23. #23

    Red face Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    woohoo.... these are the people that most intrique me.....mysterious and so beautiful, inside and out....they are one of the most misunderstood groups of people in the world

    TG or transgender people are part of the group that are known by the terms * inter sexual, contra sexual and the third sex*
    "Intersexual" is something a little different from the rest of these... it's a physiological condition. At birth, the hormones are there but whatever receptors are supposed to respond to them and cause the body to develop according to the blueprint for one particular gender somehow aren't quite working. The ambiguity therefore is there from the beginning and it's physiological.

    A rare condition, might affect one birth in thousands, and in the past there had been a tendancy for doctors to arbitrarily want to assign a female gender to these patients.

    I can't claim to know a whole lot about it; it's a medical issue and somewhat uncommon.

  24. #24

    Re: Understanding Transgender people

    Quote Originally Posted by carlb
    "Intersexual" is something a little different from the rest of these... it's a physiological condition. At birth, the hormones are there but whatever receptors are supposed to respond to them and cause the body to develop according to the blueprint for one particular gender somehow aren't quite working. The ambiguity therefore is there from the beginning and it's physiological.

    A rare condition, might affect one birth in thousands, and in the past there had been a tendancy for doctors to arbitrarily want to assign a female gender to these patients.

    I can't claim to know a whole lot about it; it's a medical issue and somewhat uncommon.
    It may be more uncommon than we really know for certain. There's a bunch of studies going around about the chromosomal structure of people... if you're going by chromosomes alone, there are six possible gender markers, which may or may not affect physical appearance, the genitals or whatnot.

    In other words, there's a lot of different ways to view intersexuality -- ambigous genitalia is not the only way. I don't claim to know a lot about this myself, but I do know some intersexed people, so was able to get a little bit of info.

    My experience is more with transsexuality -- the desire to live completely as the gender opposite of what we're born in. For me.. born female, living full time as a man.

    Alex

 

 

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