Anyone else get extreme nervousness before meeting? I'm a bi guy. Not super active but arranging to have a meet with a married bud I've been chatting with for awhile. He seems ok. Has been in no rush. But meeting a guy I don't know well for illicit sex is making very nervous. Can anyone relate? What do ppl do?
I always have a bit of nerves when meeting. Not very activated either so maybe just not "used to it"? I do know once I became more comfortable and accepting of being bi, it helped some. It also helps to be able to meet up with the same person a few times.
Being nervous before meeting a potential sex partner is normal. After all what if you don't have anything in common...lol. Seriously once you get to talking your nerves will turn to excitement! Good luck!
First meeting are always a bit nerve wracking but I have found that taking the time to chat extensively before getting naked allows all parties to get to know each other and be more relaxed when the time come to get intimate.
I still get nervous over new meetings, and I just take nice deep breaths and remind myself that this ain't my first time and to save the nervous energy to use on his dick when I get it in my mouth. Idle chatter helps to dispel overactive nerves although I've often felt "silly" for talking about a whole lot of nothing - and I've found that admitting that, yeah, I'm nervous can further break (or melt) the ice when with a guy who is more nervous than I am.
I am the king of nerves and it has meant that I have not tried m4m play as much as I want to .. still limited experience.. I think chat prior to meet helps
good advice as usual , I hope you are doing ok!Originally Posted by KDaddy23
The wife and I have been swinging for over 10 years now, and we both still get a bit of the nerves before meeting a couple or being by ourselves and meeting someone. What we do that really helps is to make sure the other person knows NOT to expect any play on the first meet (we have made exceptions of course LOL). It Allows us to focus on the people we are meeting vs the timing, logistics, removes uncertainty, and awkwardness around "are we going to play".
And, we still get butterflies when we go to a swinger club even though we have gone many many times over the years
I've been nervous every time that I've been with a guy. I know that part of it is being with someone for the first time, part of it is because it's with a guy, but I think that most of the nervousness for me is because I'm married (to a woman) and shouldn't be meeting up with anyone.
Cheating is a rush, but cheating with a guy is a huge rush. Just the thought of sucking on a thick, hard cock gets me so hard.
I am, thanks for asking! Just a slew of doctor's appointments so they can all tell me that (1) I'm doing great and (2) there's no sign of cancer in me anywhere. By the way, I've found that you can talk to your intended vict... uh, partner until you're blue in the face but when it's time to get together and get busy? Whole different story! I learned to use a martial arts thing where I don't try to not be nervous but try to use that nervous energy and it works for me; by the time we get naked, I'm no longer nervous and it's all I can do not to tackle the guy and ravish his dick thanks to being able to redirect that nervous energy.
Its ok to be nervous bud! In fact its kinda normal!
id be more worried if you were not nervous.
Try and relax and take your time. go with the flow and all will be good.
Personally I want to meet and talk. Talking face to face makes you less tense and you get a much better feel for the guy. Go out to dinner and once you feel relaxed then you can start being more open with him and take it from there. Also its good to meet face to face the first time with the intension of nothing will happen. Admitting to him your nervous might break some tension too!
good luck!
Last edited by ClassicPaCpl; Nov 8, 2024 at 3:06 PM.
It is natural to be nervous meeting any sex the first time. Natural mental state of being excepted. Like stated just make no commitment on first seeing and let it go naturally.
Yes, but my nerves now are more like the nerves I would get if I was getting ready to play in baseball game or something. My first time sucking off a man caused off the charts anxiousness, especially since he requested I'd be naked when he arrived. Driving back to my place to meet, stripping off all of my clothes, and standing there naked waiting for a man to walk in my door wanting me to suck him off had me shaking all over.
at first i did when i first started doing it after a few times nervers was not there anymore
I have met a few so far and gave bj. I was nervous as hell driving there and when met.. I like to talk a few minutes and get acquainted to calm down some and my heart beat slows back down. Once that dick is in my mouth I am in heaven and calm. No different than meeting a woman the first time. Its normal to be nervous.
Everybody has a case of nerves when meeting someone new. Just relax but listen to your intuition.
If it is to be, let it be with me
Yes, butt not now knee trembling nerves I used to get, more the hope he's as good as his profile and will I preform as I want to
I suspect every guy goes through the first meeting jitters. I've found that meeting a prospective sex partner for a frank talk in a quiet restaurant, a bar, or other public place tends to alleviate the nervousness. My current playmate, Dave, and I got to know one-another well through skype chats before we got together for actual one-on-one sex play.
I have met a number of guys and I'm always nervous. I don't know how you are connecting with guys, but I do it online and we email back and forth first. I explain to a guy that I have a routine that I insist on, for his safety and mine. I assure him that I'm not looking to message back and forth forever but I have to get to a certain comfort level before meeting. Then I have to meet with the idea that the initial meeting is just to chat and check our 'vibe'... no expectations, no obligations. If he's ok with those criteria, I automatically feel more comfortable to meet.
I tell him during emails, that he can ask me anything and I don't hesitate to ask him things also. Just make a short list of the things you really want to know.
Usually after just a few email exchanges I find out what time of day and where is best for him to meet with me. I insist that it be in a semi public setting. in one of our vehicles. That usually ends up being a not very busy strip mall where we can park at the periphery of the lot, where few others are parked and where I can see and fondle his cock (I am a no recip sucker).
Invariably, if we are both good with everything, even though it is expected to be a no expectation meeting, I end up sucking him if it is safe there, or if we can agree on a safe location.
But, blah blah. At some point in the process I get to feeling much more comfortable, if he seems compatible with my interests. It always comes down to the face to face being the deciding factor. Still....the email exchanges are always the place where the comfort level either starts to work or not. After that, the first meeting eases my nervousness.
Sounds complicated, maybe, but it's not and it really helps me to be more relaxed.
Although the initial face to face has been established as a no expectation meeting, invariably
And, also, during the email exchanges I mention to him that I get nervous about meeting. I always like it when he admits that he is nervous too. That really eases my mind.
Last edited by Rest85; Nov 14, 2024 at 9:45 PM.
Just to add to my previous comments, even if I was meeting a woman to have casual m/f sex, I'd still be nervous before meeting the first time.
Maybe some people can go into a casual sex situation in a calm state, but hell, I was at least a bit nervous with every new woman the first time we had sex, even if we had known each other for awhile.
Don't let your nerves keep you from your desires.
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